step in, step out
by Wintry Leen
Summary: Tsubasa is still in love with his best friend. TsubaSaki. Oneshot. #25


A/n: I'm not sure I got this right (flash fiction class, exercise, immediacy) but here it is anyway (valentine's, breathing).

Inspired by: Still in love with you by The Latency

* * *

step in, step out

i.

Misaki's almost floating, excited for the coming ball, and Tsubasa cannot hold it in anymore. He spins her around, kisses her. The touch of her lips makes him pull back just as quick. He releases his hold, looks into her eyes, and regrets seeing a glassy mirror. He lets her when she runs.

ii.

He knows her defense strategy and accepts her cold shoulder. But he corners her one time (thanks to Mikan), and touches her despite her resistance.

"There's nothing to talk about, Andou."

He won't say sorry: he regrets kissing her without consent, but he doesn't regret harboring those feelings. So he speaks.

"I love you. More than just a best friend."

And he doesn't regret that he gets a slap for it.

iii.

The next time he sees her, they're in the ball, and she's sitting alone by the alcohol counter, downing consecutive shots. He's supposed to be the partner, in a platonic way, but he accepts his punishment for wishing for the opposite. Girls flock around him suddenly, and he loses sight of her.

He runs and luckily catches sight of her getting dragged away by someone. He knows that she's not in her right mind, so before she leans into the stranger, Tsubasa thrusts himself in between, hugging her, protecting her from the guy.

"Leave my best friend alone."

When the guy scoffs at him before walking away, Tsubasa knows he's just been pitied.

He feels her crying into his shirt, and she looks up.

"Promise me that we're still best friends, Tsubasa."

He bites his lips and nods, hugging her tight before he can say "I can't."

iv.

He stops acting like there's something more. Casual. Just like before. And he thinks it's not really hard when it's finally clear to him what her feelings are. He can't pretend he doesn't know when she's just there, her head on his lap, eyes closed.

"Sorry for slapping you the other day."

"That's what best friends are for, right?" he grins, leaning against the tree trunk.

He thinks he needs another slap.

v.

When he sees another guy walking with Misaki, he comes to know his permanent position. So he hides.

He sees her laugh with him and seems to feel so comfortable, and thinks he's okay. He'll be okay.

Misaki sees him one time, and he attempts an escape.

"Have you been avoiding me?"

"No? I'm just busy. Hahahaha."

"Is this about Kei?"

"Eh?"

"Are you jealous?"

"Me?"

"Stop lying, Tsubasa."

He ruffles her hair and grins.

"But we're best friends. I'm not allowed to feel that."

vi.

Since Misaki won't allow him to distance himself off her, he stays. Through it all. Through all those times she has to spend time with the other guy. He'll sit at a minimal distance from them, but he's still there, pretending to read a book or sleeping when he just wants to stop dreaming for a change.

Misaki then comes to him, nudging him awake. Except that he's very much awake.

"Tsubasa..."

"Hmm?"

"I think I like him..."

She doesn't blush at all, and this is Misaki. She says nothing but sharp, honest things without unnecessary embellishments.

He grins yet again and tugs his bonnet down, clasping his hands at his nape.

"I think he likes you, too."

vii.

So Misaki and Kei get together. He still stays to protect her just in case the other guy can't. Of course, he's not there during her dates. But it's still him who makes sure she goes home okay, sleeps at night soundly, and wakes her up when her alarm doesn't go off. Then one day as they're walking together towards school, he jokes.

"I don't think you need me now that you have him."

"You're still my best friend. It's different."

She smiles, and the realization that she'll never be his hits so hard.

viii.

It's raining when Misaki runs to him and just leans on his chest.

"I'm not doing this again."

"What did he do?"

"That bastard has some other girl. I want to kick his ass."

"Want me to help you?"

She turns to look up at him.

"Are you underestimating me?"

But he looks into her eyes and regrets seeing those glassy eyes again, so he pulls her head back to his chest.

"Stop talking."

She stops and cries silently.

ix.

Valentine's comes, and a girl goes to him and confesses.

"I'm sorry."

When the girl cries, he panics.

"Give me a chance. You don't know how one-sided love hurts so much."

He understands perfectly so he gaps a bit of the distance and lays a hand on her arm.

"I'm really sorry. I understand how you feel. I'm also in love with someone else."

The girl wishes him luck through her tears, and they part with a smile.

x.

He's holding the chocolates the girl has given him when he runs into Misaki.

"Misaki!"

"Oh you've got chocolates."

He grins.

"Yes from someone."

"I like you, Tsubasa."

"Huh?"

"I like you. I like you, Tsubasa."

When he realizes the seriousness in her tone, he smiles and ruffles her hair, moving past her.

"You're confused."

xi.

He doesn't want to, but he has to execute his own defense strategy this time. He's come up with a lot of excuses until Mikan confronts him.

"Senpai, what are you doing?"

"Ha—"

"Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about."

"You won't understand, Mikan-chan."

"Well, she doesn't understand it, too! You've got to talk to her, Tsubasa-senpai..."

He flicks her forehead.

"Stubborn kouhai..."

xii.

He sees Misaki in the forest, and he instinctively takes a step back when he sees her running to him. He puts up a hand to block but winces when she sees her eyes.

"You do know this is for you, right?"

"What is for me, Tsubasa?"

"I'm giving you distance so you don't get confused."

"Who the fuck told you I'm confused!"

"You just went through a breakup...and I'm just the best friend."

"Those two are not connected at all. Why can't you understand?"

"I refuse to understand," he starts to walk away.

"No, you're just doing this for yourself!"

He grins.

"Maybe. But I can't be hurt all the time, Misaki. That's not in my job description as a best friend."

xii.

It's graduation; they haven't talked for weeks. Tsubasa's still in love, but he's still a best friend, and he still thinks that she's just confused.

But he finally decides to talk to her because it's time to grow up, and they may part ways soon.

"Misaki."

Her back is facing him, so he doesn't see her face.

"Sorry for walking out on you like that. I'm such an unworthy best fri-"

But she's suddenly in front of him, her lips pressed against the back of her hand covering his mouth so that she's looking into his eyes. She holds his gaze for a moment before withdrawing her hand.

"Stop saying that. I want to forget that it's my fault for making you think that you're just a best friend. And it's my fault that I'm blind. I want to insist that I'm not confused but I'm giving you distance, Tsubasa. But you have to promise me that you're coming back, no longer as a best friend."

And he just laughs so hard that Misaki scowls at him.

"What's the matter?"

"I'm not leaving," he grins and kisses that same hand she's retracted.

She walks into his embrace, and when he holds her and her hold on him tightens, he wants to start believing that she's not confused and he can stop dreaming.

**...**

_**Fin.**_

(i've always shipped them so hard. this isn't my usual style but i need reviews please! oh, and that kiss was inspired by a chapter in noragami. )


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